behr-behr-in-oval-office

Live report from the oval doghouse.

It’s “ruff” being a puppy in America right now. I heard the news about all the money (787 billion dollars!!!) that is going to be spent to “help people out” in America, but not ONE DOLLAR is going toward us puppies. That’s not fair! Mom read the whole economic stimulus package to me and….well, ok, maybe not the WHOLE thing cause it was putting me to sleep. Anyhow, I didn’t hear the words “dog” or “puppy” in there anywhere. I’ve decided that this is totally unacceptable!

SO, I’m going to run for puppy president. I could be the spokespuppy for all the dogs in America.

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Here’s my plan, if elected. I’m going to be the boss of that $787 billion. I”ll build kennels at all homeless shelters so people who  lost their homes won’t have to give up their dogs. Dogs are loyal friends, make their owners laugh, bring comfort, and are good listeners. If they don’t already have a dog, they get one.

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All dogs get free vet checks, dog food, and spaying/neutering. People living at the shelters will help by building and cleaning kennels, feeding  & train -ing the dogs and stuff like that, and get paid for their help. They can clean human shelters and serve them food too. (see, I’ve already created a lot of jobs!)

Then people will come and train the homeless how to start a business, and mentor them as they do start one. Then they will get a small loan to help start the business  Their puppies can stay in the kennels while their owners are in class or starting to work again. All new businesses have to be dog related. 🙂

Then I’m making the empty foreclosed houses  available for rent at an affordable price. The banks will just have to do what I say . They get in trouble if they complain. People starting dog businesses get free bus passes if they don’t have a car anymore. That means we need more bus drivers. ( & more jobs) To rent one of the empty houses you have to have a dog. If you don’t, you have to rescue one or two.

People who already have houses, but have lost their jobs get the same help with business. Their house payments will be paid for 6 months while they go thru through training IF they adopt a dog (with free vet care and food for 6 months) See? Pretty simple really. This way both dogs and families/people will have a place to live.

I think I could do all of that for WAAAAAAY less than $787 billion dollars, by the way. If only we had a spokespuppy to let the president know what our opinion was. That’s why I’m running for puppy president. See, life is simple, really. Just ask a puppy.

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Behr Behr, speaking up for the puppies of America

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